It’s a club you don’t join. It just happens, and suddenly, you’re a member. The name of the club is: Daughters without Mothers Club and I am a member.
Ever since I became a member, I play a silly game in my head. I wonder if my mother’s spirit has seeped into me. Then, boom! The wonder turns into absolute certainty. She’s within me!
On this Mother’s Day, I wondered if it happens to other members of the club. Do other Daughters Without Mothers do something out of character urged on by their mother’s spirit??? So I though I’d ask!
I’ll give you an example: My mom used to get exasperated that I always wore black and white. “Why not a little happy color?” she asked once, when I arrived with a suitcase full of clothes that were all black and white. Just after she died, I bought a multi-color jacket, almost like a quilt, with oodles of color! Bam! I could hear Mom cheering in heaven! I even wrote a story about it in a Chicken Soup for the Soul book about my coat of many colors.
Every daughter on the planet knows the many stories and conflicts about the daughter/mother relationship. I spent my childhood, shy and embarrassed about my mother’s outgoing exuberance and unconventional ways. She was NOTHING like the other mothers. Luckily, I matured and understood she was the EXACT kind of mother God knew I would need.
My mom taught me how to trust God in the darkest moments. For those of you who know us, these past few months, my family has dealt with major surgeries/health issues for three of us. Without Mom’s lessons on how to get through pain and suffering, I would’ve cracked. Her strength and spirit were within me.
I met a woman who was in the Daughters without Mothers Club. She told me she never, ever wants to see her mother again – not in heaven or in hell. She never gave any details, but I thought it was one of the saddest things I ever heard anyone say. Because I was raised that I will see my mother again one day! I did ask the woman, though, if she was a mother herself. She wasn’t. Aah, right?
All of you who have raised a child know: how do we take that little tiny baby and be perfect as their mother?
We can’t! We just do the best we can. And, if you’re lucky like I am, you’re mother’s spirit will stay with you and your world will be full of color.
If you’re in the Daughters without Mothers Club, tell me what happened when you just knew you’re mother’s spirit was within you?